- Inner Healing through Laughing and Crying 
The Blessings of Being a Forgiver


Scriptures on Forgiving: “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. … “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: … But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (Matthew 6:12, 14, 15).”

Scriptures on Thanksgiving: “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name … In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you … (Psalms 100:4, 1Thessalonians 5:18)


    Patricia: “I Hate My Husband”

     A number of years ago, while we were ministering in Australia, Patricia approached me, and whispered, “I hate my husband. I want to love him. Can you help me?”

    The Holy Spirit showed me that unforgiveness toward her father was the root cause of Patricia’s hatred and distrust of her husband. “The problem is your father, Patricia,” I said. “Are you willing to forgive him? Are you willing to release all rage toward your father?”

 She replied, “Yes, I need help. My relationship with my father was terrible, and it’s true, I do hate him.” “As Rev. Chappell began praying for me for the terrible hurts and rejection from my father, I began sobbing deeply and fell out under the power of God. I was there for at least thirty minutes. It seemed to go on forever. When I got up, I was a new person. The rejection and hurts from Dad were gone. I even felt a love for him. As this hatred toward him left, my hatred toward my husband also melted away and was replaced by love. My marriage has been restored and our home has become a place of His Glory.”


Bob: A Financial Curse Removed through Forgiveness

   “My rent is unpaid, my car payment over due, my gas tank nearly empty, and the Lord seems so distant,” said Bob. He continued, “I am an expert in computer technology and I have always been highly esteemed, but for some unknown reason I recently lost my job. I have looked for one job after another with no success. I am puzzled. I have never had problems like these. Why is all this happening to me?”

     A few weeks before this happened, Bob had received the greatest emotional shock of his life. He discovered that his attractive, brunette wife Sally had been committing adultery with one of his best friends, a young, good-looking business executive. He became bitter and full of rage.

 “Reverend Chappell explained to me that unforgiveness had brought a curse in my life affecting my finances and my relationship with God. He explained to me that forgiving them did not mean I was condoning sin, nor was it a sign of weakness. Also he showed me I did not have to resume my relationship with them. So I quickly agreed to forgive them both, and even prayed a prayer of blessing over their lives. Wow! How different I now feel!”

  In Jesus Name, Bob and I then broke the curse of poverty off of his life and called forth a new job. Within a few days God have him a wonderful miracle. He received a new job, even better than his previous one.

   Bob said this, “The best part is that I feel closer to the Lord than ever and His Presence is with me through much of the day.”

    Henry: Healed through Forgiveness

 “I was set to be operated on in three days for the non-stop pain in my back, said Henry. My emotional pain was just as bad. I had bitterness toward mom and dad and quite a few women. Rev. Chappell said I needed to forgive them all to get emotional and physical healing . . . He laid hands on my head, and I began to laugh, and then I cried and even screaming came, and then more laughter. For about an hour this continued. Then I felt peace, joy and the Presence of the Lord from the depths of my being. I knew I had forgiven all of them and my emotional pain was gone. I was soon aware that all pain had left my back. I was healed!”

    Henry canceled the back operation and repeatedly testified of the miracle Jesus gave him—healing of His back and a closer walk with the Lord.


Have you been hurt deeply, disappointed, taken advantage of, or abused? Most of us have!

    To some degree we are all like Patricia, Bob and Henry. You have probably reacted with unforgivenss, bitterness, complaining, negative thoughts, criticizing, and/or gossip. Instead let’s learn to respond by faith with thanksgiving that God is going to give us victory in every trial. Let’s live also a lifestyle of thanksgiving to God for His many gifts to us including our nation, our friends, our loved ones, our health, our finances, our salvation, and for God’s love for us. We will become free from complaining, criticizing and holding grudges. We will become forgiving, loving, joy-filled Christians. Our loved ones will be blessed immensely through our new response to the challenges of life.

What is forgiving?

     In the Old Testament it was one’s right to have a partial revenge, an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. In the New Testament we are under “grace” and required by the Lord to forgive. Forgiveness is releasing a person from a debt they owe us. We give up the right to get revenge, get even, or hold bitterness. Are you willing to do that from deep within your heart? I believe you are.

     The desire for revenge causes us to become driven by the disappointments, hurts, and rejection by others. What we sow we will reap. Sow unforgiveness or revenge and we will reap that from others. Forgive and we shall be forgiven. Give mercy and we will receive mercy. This is “love” and must become a way of life in order for us to have peace and joy in our lives and to live in His Presence.

We need to know what forgiveness is not.

1)   Forgiveness does not mean we will have to trust the person again, but it does open the door to the possibility that trust can eventually be reestablished if they change enough.

2)   It does not necessarily include a restoration of a relationship, friendship, or marriage, but we must forgive the guilty persons. It will increase our prayer power in these areas.

3)   Forgiveness does not mean that what they have done is all right. They have sinned against you and God. They are guilty. Through forgiveness, we release them to God. This frees them and us!

4)   Forgiveness is not weakness but strength.  
Whom do we need to forgive?

1)Parents, marriage partners, children, friends, strangers, spiritual and political leaders. For our own benefit, we need to forgive others even if they don’t deserve it or even want it, and even if they are dead!

2) We need to forgive ourselves for bad mistakes in our lives.

3)  Even though God is always perfect in love and justice, we still need to “forgive Him” when we think He has let us down.

What are the Signs of Unforgiveness in our lives?

1) We still feel hurt or rejected by what they did.

2) We are deeply disappointed in a person, in ourselves, in life, or in God.

3) We would like to get even with a person--hurt them back. We have a “grudge.”

4) The presence of cancer, arthritis, self-pity, self-condemnation, grumbling and complaining, criticism, depression, or negativity in our lives is almost always rooted in unforgivenss.

5) The presence of much sickness in our life. There is almost always significant unforgivenss when one has cancer, arthritis, or other auto-immune conditions.

 What do we gain from forgiveness?

       1) Frees us from anger, resentments, and bitterness, and brings us an inner peace.

 2) Helps our relationship with God and with others. His Glorious Presence increases.

 3) It frees God to forgive us of our   sins and to answer our prayers!

 4) Forgiving our parents is part of honoring our parents, which is the greatest key to marital harmony.   

           5) Our prayer power is no longer weakened. Mark 11:25.      

 What do we lose from unforgiveness?

      1)   It opens the door for Satan to attack us in our finances and

      2)   To cause physical, emotional or mental sickness and

      3)   To attack our marriage partner and/or our children (See Matthew 18:21-25).

      4)   In negative ways we become like the person we judge!

      5)   An unforgiving heart robs us of peace, joy, and health.

      6) We lose much of the Presence of God.

      7)   Our Heavenly Father will not forgive us of our sins (Mark 11:25).

How do we forgive others?

1) Recognize and repent of the sin of judging, of unforgiveness, of having a wrong attitude toward the person who has hurt you. Keep in mind that you and I hurt others also, and often we need forgiveness.

2) With God’s help make the decision to forgive.

3) Alone with God, intercede in prayer for the person who has hurt you. This is powerful in producing forgiveness.

4) Seek emotional healing of the hurts causing the unforgiveness. Allow the pain in loud praying in tongues to leave you. Even anger can leave in intense praying in tongues.

      In the first 2 chapters of Job, Satan brings destruction to his sons and daughters, to his wealth and brings boils on his body. In Job 5:22 God does not tell Job to pray, to fast, or to seek prayer from others, but commands Job to laugh at this incredible trial in his life, “At destruction and famine thou shall laugh.” This is a holy laugh, one of faith, submissiveness and warfare. It is powerful. Try it. Do it. Persist in it. It will work.

5) Sometimes we need to forgive others in person, over the telephone or by letter. However, there are times, it is best not to go to the person, or impossible. They might even be dead. In this case we must express our forgiveness for them directly to God.

6) Continually thank God for everything He and others have given you and done for you. It will help you to forgive everyone, and to overcome self-pity and mumbling and complaining (a twin of unforgiveness!).

7)         See my website, for free downloading of part or my entire book, “Laugh and Cry Your Way to Freedom.”

Now That We See How to Forgive, Let’s Do It!

     A number of years ago by the help of the Holy Spirit, I had to make a list of 21 people, whom I had only partially forgiven or not at all! I got busy and did a lot of forgiving. Now it is your turn! So make your list now. Perhaps it will only be two or three or perhaps it will be 21 or more!   So get busy forgiving. When you do this, you will be well on your way to forgiving others deeply and receiving all the blessings that go with it. Isn’t that wonderful!  God will be so pleased.       

    If you desire us to minister in your church or home group, contact us at our address below.   To purchase our materials, or give to our ministry, you may write us, call us or go to our website and use your credit card.


John Chappell, The Chappell Ministries, Inc. 

PO Box 172, Bartow, FL 33831, Email Web

Cell phone 863-221-1479